Don’t Ask Why Just Remember How

One of the first questions we ask when faced with a trial is “why?”

Why is this happening to me?

Why is it happening now?

Why did this happen despite my righteous desires?

Why is this happening despite my faith and obedience to God?

And more often than not those answers don’t come, don’t come quickly enough, or don’t come in a way we think. 

I have spent a lot of mental energy over the years trying to guess the why’s behind the trials and hurt I have endured. As mortals, we find it comforting to be able to speak to why something happens; it helps us settle ourselves so we can move forward understanding the whole picture. But more often than not, God will only give us a glimpse, if that, and we must press forward trusting that His ways are far wiser than our own. 

And in a more recent trial, no answer I can come up with to my why questions have been satisfactory or lasting, nor has God revealed any reason to me. He expects me to press forward with hope—not knowledge—that it will all work together for my good, even if this new path isn’t what I desire. God’s ways are truly not our ways, and at the moment His promises can seem unlikely to come to fruition, but pain can often change our eyes, leading us to only seek the mortal answers to our problems. However, those answers are eternal in nature and most especially eternal in their resolution and ultimate joy. 

I received a priesthood blessing recently where I was assured that “God has a plan for [me] to be happy.”

Nowhere in the blessing did He say why I was enduring this current trial, only that He has a plan for the future and that it most definitely ensures my sadness and pain will be exchanged for happiness. 

So, I have stopped asking why. And I have remembered that He is how joy and happiness and relief come in this life and the next. 

Stop asking why and remember how. 

How can I make it through this painful trial?  By leaning on Jesus Christ.

How can I find hope? Through Jesus Christ. 

How can I heal this pain? Through the Atonement of Jesus Christ. 

How can I repair what has been broken? Through the Atonement of Jesus Christ. 

How can I forgive? Through Jesus Christ. 

How can I be forgiven? Through Jesus Christ. 

How can I hope to see a light beyond my current dark path? Jesus. 

The answer is always Jesus. 

He may not give you the answer to any of your Why questions (at least for this moment) but the answer to every How question always ends the same. 

It is Jesus Christ. 

He is always the answer. 

So, go to Him. He will lead you along and heal you every step of the way until his plan is revealed and his promises are kept, likely in ways you can’t even imagine. 

He loves you and wants to carry you through whatever trial you face. He is always the answer. He is the way. And He is how we navigate the hardest parts of mortality to receive our eternal glory. 


Melissa has endured a number of life’s challenges but has found greater strength through her faith in the Savior. She strives to share with others how purpose, resilience, and healing all come through Jesus Christ, and while covering these big topics, she is known to jump up and down and excitedly say, “Jesus is awesome!”

“I want to help women realize that they have such a capacity for greatness. When we do our best and rely on the Savior, wonderful things can happen.”

Melissa lives in Las Vegas with her husband and twin toddlers. She is a stay-at-home mom by day and a writer by night. Her favorite things to do in her free time are sleep and read—especially the scriptures.

You can connect with Melissa on Instagram or on her website I’m Learning to Thrive.